Published: “Noughties or Nice” in Texture Magazine

My curmudgeonly review of the decade was published in Texture Magazine this month. Ch-ch-check it out:

Noughties or Nice @ Texture Magazine

Like the title? I do too. I always forget to title my articles so the editors make something up for me. It’s way more clever than anything I could come up with.

Lots of great stuff in Texture if you haven’t read it before. I’m especially fond of Aaron Levin’s album reviews.

So I went to visit an accountant today, which is likely the most adult thing I’ve done in my entire life. I guess now I can call him My Accountant because I will be giving him money eventually. He’s a pleasant fellow with gray hair and a slight British accent.

I was thinking: paper is stupid. I was sorting through my mess of important documents at home looking for some tax records I’d likely erroneously recycled and I was thinking about how dumb it is. Like, these documents are just reflecting what’s in the CRA’s big ol’ database of taxes. Why do I have to keep them for seven years? Why can’t I just go to the CRA’s website and issue a query to get a PDF of them? Oh right,┬ábecause some people don’t understand the Internet.

My personal filing system is broken because all I do is put my documents in a big folder marked TAXES and call it a day. That’s kind of how I sort my documents on the computer because I just hit command-space and type some words to find my document instantly. This does not work with paper. Instead I sit on the floor with a folder full of papers with tiny writing scrawled upon them, hunting for dates and information with my eyes. Come on! I am not made for this.

My Accountant, however, is. I could tell by the way he obsessively rearranged his sticky notes in my file. The ones on the bottom formed a left-to-right tabbing system to quickly visit various documents. The ones sticking out from the right side indicated action items.

This behaviour specifically was what made me respect the man, because there’s no way in hell I could stay so organized. Essentially I’m paying the guy to organize paper for me, and after a night of wading through dusty, crumpled pages looking for CRA Notice of Assessment 2008 pages one and three (and not finding them) I think his services are totally worth it.